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{GeneSys, Unlimited}

{ Genesys, Unlimited: un centro de investigación instalado en los terrenos de la antigua ciudad del telepredicador Retribution Roberts. Nada de lo que se cuenta aquí es cierto; pero tampoco es mentira. }

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©2002 Morwen

Inicio > Historias > Por qué no es prudente investigar las cosas demasiado en serio

Por qué no es prudente investigar las cosas demasiado en serio

El asunto de la cafetera y del café púrpura ha tenido un desenlace inesperado y algo confuso que puede que cuente luego. Pero no me resisto a transcribiros, más o menos, la escena que tuvo lugar ayer por la mañana.

Estaba yo en el laboratorio cuando entró al galope Giacomo Orreri (nombres cambiados para la protección de los culpables).
—¡Lo tengo! ¡Lo encontré!
Esta es la frase habitual de presentación de Giacomo en cualquier circunstancia; ya estoy acostumbrada.
—¿Qué has encontrado? —dije con calma.
—¡Todo, la respuesta a todo! O al menos al colapso de nuestro modo de vida, ¡no lo dudes! Dime, ¿cuál es, hoy por hoy, el objeto cotidiano más útil de nuestra civilización?
—Sorpréndeme —dije, reprimiendo el impulso de apartarme un poco de Giacomo, que solía puntuar todas sus explicaciones con aspavientos dignos de Gene Kelly y una aspersión de saliva capaz de terminar con la sequía de un país mediano.
Giacomo extrajo algo blanco y leve de un bolsillo y lo mostró con orgullo. Lo miré un segundo en silencio.
—Es un... kleenex.
—¡Exacto! Útil, cómodo, ligero, portátil... —Giacomo se sonó ruidosamente la nariz y luego agitó en el aire el kleenex. Yo me aparté un poco—. Y ahora, totalmente inútil. Usado. Gastado. Un peso más que añadir a nuestro pobre planeta.
El kleenex salió volando en dirección a mi papelera, falló, y cayó al suelo con un sonido húmedo. Giacomo no hizo caso. Yo sí.
—¿Puedes imaginar cuántos kleenex se usan cada día, sólo en Estados Unidos? ¡Miles! ¡Millones! ¡Billones! ¡El derroche, el gasto, el despilfarro! —Giacomo se tiraba de los pelos, auténticamente angustiado, cuando de pronto una sonrisa beatífica le iluminó el semblante. Parecía un profeta del desierto que ve llegar a los pájaros trayéndole el almuerzo.
—Y entonces se me ocurrió. La solución. Simple, elegante, ecológica, ¡perfecta!
Nuevamente un objeto blanco fue agitado triunfalmente ante nuestros ojos.
—¿Otro kleenex? —aventuré tímidamente.
—¡El Ecokleenex! El principio es el mismo, pero con una sutil diferencia —me alargó el kleenex para que lo examinara. Giacomo sonreía de oreja a oreja y relucía de orgullo.
—Observarás que el tamaño es algo mayor de lo normal, lo que ofrece una ergonomía más eficiente. Lo mejor es que después de cada uso es posible un reciclaje completo del producto, por su composición de fibras vegetales higroscópicas e insolubles. Con un número reducido de unidades, no es problema que parte de ellas estén en la fase de recuperación del ciclo.
—Impresionante, Giacomo —dije, devolviéndole su hallazgo.
—¿Verdad que sí?
—Pocas veces me habías sorprendido tanto. De todas formas, y como medida de precaución, yo de ti consultaría la base de datos de patentes.
—Oh, puro trámite, puro trámite... Estas inspiraciones no se dan muy a menudo.
—Sin duda. Aun así, hazme ese favor. Por mi tranquilidad más que nada —dije, guiándole suavemente hacia la puerta—. No me gustaría que te quedaras atascado por algún estúpido problema burocrático.
—Tienes razón, tienes razón. Burocrático. No puede ser. Voy a mirar, sí. Gracias, gracias, eres una amiga.
—No sabes cuánto. Hale, ya me contarás.
Giacomo se fue murmurando detalles técnicos para sí y yo cerré la puerta cuidadosamente tras el inventor del pañuelo de tela, perdón, Ecokleenex.

Giacomo no está loco, aunque pueda parecerlo; es simplemente incapaz de procesar la información del mundo exterior. Demasiado creativo. Tiene a su nombre varias patentes que le dan unos buenos ingresos, pero no puede parar de inventar. El problema es que no tiene ni idea de cómo funciona el mundo real. Probablemente, tampoco sabe lo que es. Cuando está fuera de su banco de trabajo tiene la capacidad de concentración de un cubito de hielo.
No pasará mucho tiempo antes de que Giacomo se de cuenta de que no ha inventado nada nuevo. Seguramente usará su nuevo invento para enjugarse las lágrimas y se pondrá a inventar otra cosa. Quizá el sacacorchos, quién sabe.

¿Entendéis ahora por qué me encanta trabajar en GeneSys?

2002-03-31 03:56 | 39 Comentarios


Referencias (TrackBacks)

URL de trackback de esta historia http://morwen.blogalia.com//trackbacks/626

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De: Zanco Panco Fecha: 2002-04-03 10:00

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